Hot Mess

Hot mess. I'm borrowing that terminology from my sis-in-law because it seems to perfectly describe exactly how I've been feeling lately (like the last 4-1/2 months).  Losing weight has been, well, a losing battle. I'm really not trying to lose a lot of weight, but I know I would feel better if I could lose anywhere between 15 and 20 pounds.  The problem is the scale keeps going up instead of down.  I know I've cheated and had an occasional soda here and there, and yes I've had a few pieces of Easter candy out of Ella's basket and could probably stand to change my diet a little more drastically, but I have been exercising and I have changed my diet to where I am eating better without starving myself. I like to eat 3 meals per day. I feel worse if I skip a meal or eat hardly anything at all.  I've tried more smaller meals throughout the day, but struggle even more with that.  As far as exercising goes, the only thing I enjoy doing is walking, which really worked well for me last time I wanted to lose weight, the body ball and my free weights. I use the elliptical we have, but that is rather boring to be honest, and we only spent $50 on it, so you really do get what you pay for. I still try to use it when I can't get around to doing something other form of exercise, but would prefer not to.

I had an appointment for a small run-in with a wine bottle to the eye and for my lateral epicondylitis last week.  During that appointment the doctor asked how my thyroid was doing. I explained to him how my back and face have been breaking out really bad and how my menses are really off schedule. I told him I thought it was hormones and he seemed to agree that it was hormones and not my thyroid levels. But now it has me wondering. The thyroid does control certain hormones and with knowing that, it had me wondering how my thyroid was really doing; so I hopped onto Mayo Clinic to read up on hypothyroidism once again. I filled out a profiler to evaluate the symptoms I am experiencing and how it may be related to my thyroid problems. After doing this, it tells me that it sounds like my dosage is too low. So now I feel like I should have maybe discussed more of the symptoms with my doctor to see if I needed to have my blood tested again. I do have an appointment with my other doctor next week and may bring it up to him.

I just can't help but feeling blah, which in turn makes me grouchy, which in turn makes me feel guilty when I get short with my husband and my daughter. I'm really just tired of having to take the thyroid medication on top of 3 others I have to take, which can get complicated because you can only take them within a certain time frame of each other or they don't work properly. I'm always fatigued/tired, anxious, can't get to sleep no matter how tired I am, keep gaining weight instead of losing, no longer have a regular cycle,  have a hard time remembering things unless I write them down, always cold, have joint pains and aches and can't concentrate. I'm back to square one prior to my diagnosis. I'm a hot mess.

Listography: My Elementary School Teachers

Cannot believe I still remember my elementary school teachers. Can't remember any of my college professor's names, but I can remember elementary. Go figure. If you took me to each school, I could even point out the classrooms, that is, if they even exist anymore.

 

My Elementary School Teachers

• Preschool: Ms. Goose
• Preschool: Mrs. Travis (yes, I repeated preschool. Parents started me too early).
• Kindergarten: Mrs. Nickerson
• First Grade: Mrs. Travis
• Second Grade: Mrs. Stenman
• Third Grade: Ms. Lewis
• Fourth Grade: Mr. Rothwell
• Fifth Grade: Mrs. Fisher
• Six Grade: Mrs. Jefferson

 Wonder what they're all doing now...

My Listography

It has been quite a while since I've posted anything. Not much has been going on really other than work, work and more work. So with that, I really have not had anything too exciting to post. I am starting another little scrapbook project...Listography. Another approach to a biography utilizing short lists of random things to tell others a little bit about yourself. There's actually a website, and books/journals, that give ideas on different topics for creating these lists (www.listography.com) So on top of doing Project Life, I am going to add this to the list.

Here's the start to my listography:

Memories from Childhood

• Living on a farm the first 7 years of my life with cattle, chickens and pigs (Can you say: pee-you?)
• Using the corn crib topper as a fort (until it was installed).
• Collecting eggs and having my legs pecked to death in the process by the crazy chickens.
• Going to Logan's Landing to feed the swans and ducks with my grandma and mom.
• My Raggedy Ann and Andy swimming pool.
• Being chased through the cornfield by the 2 neighbor dogs all the way from great grandma's and grandpa's and emerging covered head-to-toe with sand burrs.
• Having huge veggie gardens (something I miss a lot).
• Building forts with my brother and making "mushroom stew." (and no, we never ate it).
• Spending many summer days/nights at my aunt's and uncle's on Spider Lake.
• Being hit by a fire rescue truck after being dropped off for school. A bus driver waved an okay for me cross the street in front of the school and Whack!. Smacked by a fire rescue truck driven by Mr. Pickard. All for the entire school population to see. If my mom hadn't yelled at me to stop, he would have literally run me over. Instead, just the corner and driver's side panel hit me.

So that is the start to my listography. Just odds and ends about me.

Feeding the swans at Logan's Landing.

Not sure I would ever get that close to one now.

Project Life: Weeks 11 and 12

Week 11

A few of my favorite jeans.

Too small for me to wear at the present time.

Shooting for the end of April/mid-May to be able to wear them again.

I guess I better step it up.

There's a lot more waiting to be worn.

Week 12

Oh, look...more snow.

Lots of it.

It's officially spring.

But only on paper.

View out front door. 

What are we looking at?

Snow.

What did we see in the same spot the day before?

Our sidewalk with very little snow.

The hubby is actually at the end of the driveway snowblowing when I took this.

Hopefully, for the last time this winter.

Umm...yeah, right.

Update

Here's an update. I have been walking at least 3 times per week for 30 to 40 minutes at a time, doing the elliptical 1 to 2 times per week for 30 minutes at a time and trying to do some weight training and the body ball each night.  I have only lost 4 pounds, but I'm getting there.  I originally wanted to lose 15, but later changed it to 20.

Today I noticed that my jeans are fitting a little loose and my gut's not hanging over like a muffin.  I do notice a change in the appearance of my stomach, although it is far from what it used to look like.  I wonder now if it will ever look like it did.  I guess we will just have to see over the next 30 to 60 days.

I expected to be at square one when I started working out again: only able to do cardio for 15 minutes before wanting to totally quit and not being able to lift more than 2.5 pounds when doing arm exercises.  I basically was able to start where I had left off 4 years ago.  That helps to motivate and push me to do more, although it is not always possible with a near-three-year-old always at your feet.

I have given up pop pretty much all together. The last one I drank was at our niece's b-day party.  I pretty much drink water now. Occasionally, I put in a splash of lemonade to give it some flavor, but it still tastes pretty much like boring 'ole water.  Tried to drink iced tea more, but I can't handle the caffeine that often.

So here's to the rest of the 16 pounds. Hoping to lose at least 10 in the next 6 weeks.

Project Life: Week 10

Week 10

Violets.

Used as center pieces in our wedding.

One of the best days of my life.

That was nearly 9 years ago.

This plant is one of the center pieces.

It has grown quite a bit since the tiny planter it came in.

Just like us.

My Little Friend

Say hello to my little friend. My new weapon. It was recently added to my aides in losing the last 15 (or 20...it varies week to week).  I finally replaced my balance ball. Can't do sit-ups or crunches without it. It saves me from getting the low back pain I get when working out on the floor.  I did my first sets yesterday and am feeling it today. It's a good pain though. It tells me something is working. No pain, no gain. Right? Right! Now my legs are going to be feeling the pain later after my 35-minute power walk I did earlier today. Actually, my knee joints are going to be feeling the pain.  They already feel it.

I'm now down 2 pounds since I last blogged this topic.  May not sound like a lot, but it's a start and I'm happy it's going down and not up. Now only if it would continue to go that direction until my goal is reached. Can't wait to get there.